Retail Rants

Yes two blogs in one day! They aren't related so they get separate posts. I now give you a new segment on this little corner I have carved out on the internet: RETAIL RANTS. I have been in the mall world for nearly 12 years and whew lawd has it been a time. I have more stories about humans and their disgusting ways than you will ever fathom and all true, even if they sound far-fetched...trust me I wish some were! So for the introduction to this ongoing series I will prepare you and my brethren in sales for the holiday season.

It is almost Halloween and I could not be more excited. However in the retail world this means that the ramp-up to the holiday spending season has begun. Pumpkins share space on shelves with reindeer and pilgrims. Everything is overwhelming, everything is super colorful (but like only in various shades of red, gold, silver, black & green), everything is somehow covered in glitter, it's a lot. I feel bad for Thanksgiving honestly, it's a big friends & family holiday on it's own but it's completely overshadowed by both Halloween and Christmas in the stores. Christmas is already in full force and it is only October 19th....settle down Santa. Like when you think about it Easter has it the best: After Easter has passed the next major decorating holiday is the Fourth of July, which is two to three months away, you don't get gifts and your main concern is where you are going to light off all your fireworks. The long lull of summer gives way afterwards and everyone just chills out until October 1st when, in seasonally appropriate climates, Autumn has arrived and literally I'm pretty sure everyone loses their damn minds. I already know that I will actually be off on Thanksgiving because A) I work for a nice company and B) This is how flipping early we need to start preparing for Black Friday. Now, like yesterday, I'm 85% sure our schedule is mocked up somewhere in the office because this is how important retail has made shopping and the holidays. I love the holidays, don't get me wrong, I really love how cozy the nights are around the bonfire with my friends and how everyone's families get together and come to town, it's wonderful. Working during this time is a shenanigan show of complete unpredictability.  The people I have met/helped over the years have run the gamut from sweet as pie to the actual devil spawn. You never know exactly what you will get, I had my very first customer one Black Friday afternoon yell at me for the pricing that was out of my control. She was SO mad about the fact that we had advertised certain pricing for the early birds and then didn't carry that over to the people strolling in at 3pm....Ma'am I didn't choose this. I've also had an amazing customer that I helped find all their Office Christmas party gifts (he was the CEO) in one swoop.

My main rant for today is a focus of pure human decency. I understand that the holiday season is stressful, I understand that so many people are pressed for time, I understand that money is tight in most cases. I GET IT, I'M WITH YOU. So in turn....very simply....Please don't treat sales people like shit. Honestly. We all have families and friends that we want to be with, that we are also shopping for when we are able and when we are on the clock we are there to help you 100%. I have zero control over any of my companies signs/promotions/pricing/item allotments. I do not make any decisions about what they put out into the world. I just work there. I can help you in only the perimeters of which are set forth by a team of people who work very far from where you and I stand. Please try and remember this when you cop an attitude with a cashier because the price that rang up was the price on the item and not whatever you assumed it might be. Ask us a million questions, that is what I am there for! I can provide so much information, I can get you any size, I can offer opinions on what to wear to the event and if this matches these shoes you have. I love doing that! I will personal shop for you all day. At the end of the day we are all humans just trying to get through this weird and wild world, the easiest thing to do is Just Be Kind.

The rants will continue through this crazy 2K16 holiday jam we are about to dive into...so stay tuned for all the storytimes!

Keep on, Keepin' on,

M.

And Now, A Festive Song :)

A departure from my normal ramble, here now...and mostly because I just sang it in my head....And at Christmastime you want to remember the things that make you laugh, I give to you the:

12 Days of Skunkmas:

On the first day of Skunkmas my fur love gave to me....a tail like a Christmas tree.

On the second day of Skunkmas my fur love gave to me...two playful nips and a tail like a Christmas tree.

One the third day of Skunkmas my fur love gave to me...three fast stomps, two playful nips and a tail like a Christmas tree.

On the fourth day of Skunkmas my fur love gave to me...four nose kisses, three fast stomps, two playful nips and a tail like a Christmas tree.

On the fifth day of Skunkmas my fur love gave to me five snuggle hours! Four nose kisses, three fast stomps, two playful nips and a tail like a Christmas tree.

On the sixth day of Skunkmas my fur love gave to me six dens for hiding, five snuggle hours! Four nose kisses, three fast stomps, two playful nips and a tail like a Christmas tree.

On the seventh day of Skunkmas my fur love gave to me seven brakes a-rearing, six dens for hiding, five snuggle hours! Four nose kisses, three fast stomps, two playful nips and a tail like a Christmas tree.

On the eighth day of Skunkmas my fur love gave to me eight claws a-scratching, seven brakes a-rearing, six dens for hiding, five snuggle hours! Four nose kisses, three fast stomps, two playful nips and a tail like a Christmas tree.

On the ninth day of Skunkmas my fur love gave to me nine rounds of chasing, eight claws a-scratching, seven brakes a-rearing, six dens for hiding, five snuggle hours! Four nose kisses, three fast stomps, two playful nips and a tail like a Christmas tree.

On the tenth day of Skunkmas my fur love gave to me ten tries at begging, nine rounds of chasing, eight claws a-scratching, seven brakes a-rearing, six dens for hiding, five snuggle hours! Four nose kisses, three fast stomps, two playful nips and a tail like a Christmas tree.

On the eleventh day of Skunkmas my fur love gave to me eleven shadows following, ten tries at begging, nine rounds of chasing, eight claws a-scratching, seven brakes a-rearing, six dens for hiding, five snuggle hours! Four nose kisses, three fast stomps, two playful nips and a tail like a Christmas tree.

On the twelfth day of Skunkmas my fur love gave to me twelve food bowls eaten, eleven shadows following, ten tries at begging, nine rounds of chasing, eight claws a-scratching, seven brakes a-rearing, six dens for hiding, five snuggle hours! Four nose kisses, three fast stomps, two playful nips and a tail like a Christmas treeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!! 

Thanksgiving is Nearly Here!

The holidays are upon us friends! I am honestly looking forward to both Thanksgiving and Chirstmas this year. More than I have in the past few years and I'll tell you what: It's great :)

I've been in retail for going on 11 years now and as the holiday season has crept up faster and sooner, it zapped alot of the spirit out of me for many years. On top of some person drama during those years, I really gave up on good cheer, just putting on a nice front. This year things have come back to a bit of normalcy and drama has been squashed away, and even my store has gone companywide and given us a day completely off on Thanksgiving. The mall held out until November to put up their Christmas lights. I heard Santa isn't even showing up til after Black Friday!

Also, in moving over here to St. Pete, we have bonded with a wonderful block and now I have a pair of lovely ladies to craft Christmas bobbles and garlands with! We're so happy to get together and just enjoy each other's company. My parents had a neighborhood group when they lived in Chicago and they always talk of it with fond memories. To this day I'm pretty sure they still send each other Christmas cards....30 years later! This is the neighborhood we have found, this is where we'll stay :)

When I do crafting, trust that I shall put a few DIY blogs up!

Keep on, keepin' on,

M.

When did November Get Here??

It's November and finally we get a break in the heat! Current temp outside is a breezy 54 degrees!

This has been one of the best Halloween months on record. Between Haunted Hike, our 2nd Annual Halloween party and all our gatherings with friends have been really fun and wonderful. We are already planning out our props and costumes for next year, I'm pretty excited.

On the front burner is Thanksgiving. Why yes folks, there is in fact a holiday between Halloween and Christmas :) We are having a "Friendsgiving" this year and with all the traditional food, I always like to slip in a new recipe. Haven't found the right one, but I'm pinteresting for sure.

On the other front burner is how I can organize my space! We moved here in May and I have A LOT of things still waiting to be unpacked. This could just be an eye opener on what I could purge right out of my life seeing as how I haven't used/looked at these items in 5 months...BUT I know myself and that self is saying oh you know one day I'll need this. Spoiler: I won't.

But that's what's on deck for my Sunday.

Glad I woke up early and gave myself the challenge of writing to you, the internet. Being slightly proud :)

Keep on, keepin' on,

M.

What a Crap Day

Seriously, Tuesday was tops but Wednesday can kick rocks.

Tuesday I went to work and it was a pretty normal day. I was looking forward to trivia because I hadn't been in a bit. Near the end of my shift, two girls came in and I recognized the one...turns out they were part of Miley Cyrus' twerk team, so pretty cool, plus they were super nice.

So then I get off work and go down to Pete & Shorty's which is basically "Cheers" IRL. Anyway, not only was the usually group there, but also my bro-in-law and a couple friends I haven't seen in a while. It was great and we all got properly drunk together.

Came home and had a good hang out with my man and his bro, passed out and thought of the upcoming days.

So insert a small hiccup: When I got home from the bar, I noticed that my battery light was on in my car. Thought to myself, alright, just pop over to Autozone before work and get this sorted out.


Nope.

So I go and they test things and the battery is fine and then the guy looks over at the other side of the car and bam, "Oh hey, figured out what happened...one of your belts shredded!" Oh cool, yea that's swell.

Bought a belt. Called off work. Felt sick.

OH and to top this, when I originally walked out to go to the store I looked at the side yard and realized..

That really, SOMEONE HAD COME UP IN MY YARD AND STOLE MY BIKE

WTF. Seriously, it didn't even have working tires. DUDE FUCK YOU.

Back to my belts.....my man said he'd fix it, so I wasn't worried. But to be honest I've done a number on my poor car and treated it like an old rubbish bin. Working on this car was a complete nightmare. First the belt didn't fit, got new belts, oops turns out the first one was right, great. Oi! Broke a bolt cause it had rusted so bad. Oh wait, I work at 8 in the am tomorrow, now we both have to get up in the dark dawn. Just fab, really.

Quick side note, not only did some wank steal my damn bike, but we have this mannequin out front tied to our palm tree. It was a halloween prop from two seasons ago, we kept it up, cause a) we're dark and weird and b) whose going to burgle a home with a bloody dummy kept up year round? Well I guess we were wrong in the latter because whomever stole my bike also stole the dummy's head.

I'm sorry what? Who are you coming into my yard? You've got some sort of message?! Got one for you: Stay off my property, you loser scum!

Yea so ok, woke up way early and my man graciously took me to work and in the midst of having his own work to go to, promised to fix up my poor rubbish car.

Fast forward to end of day and my best friend and sister picked me up and we got to have a nice catch up hang while waiting to see if my man could macguyver a way for my car to drive again. Spoiler alert: he did! Yay!

I still have to take it in, it sounds like a train when driving. I really need a new car, I didn't expect thinking about buying one at Christmas.

I haven't even gotten all my shopping done, I don't know what to make for dessert at my bro-in law's, I got a card from my parents and I wish I hadn't (that is a story for another day), and it just feels like this year was a blur and a half.

Blah.

Keep on, keepin' on,

M.

Weather, You Are Drunk!

It is December 8th. I am here in Florida and the high today will be 82. 82!?! It is nearly Christmas and I want to wear a festive sweater! And tights! And not feel like I'm about to overheat! UGH WTH.

I have lived here mostly my whole life and it took until I was 26 to see and play in actual snow. Yes I love Florida because I constantly live "on vacation", but what I would do for some seasons. Nice Autumns with the leaves changing and brisk Winters with snow wonderland everywhere. My man thinks I'm mad for wanting snow at all, he grew up in Buffalo and told me it wears on you after a while. I still want to live someplace with seasons. I don't even care.

Update on life....since it's taken me two days to write a blog.....cool.......

We put up our tree yesterday and it's about half decorated. I can't find a good tree skirt and it made me feel so bad that I came home in stress tears. Being a girl is a constant struggle!! I don't know what came over me but it made me feel sort of ridiculous. Any-who, I still haven't finished the tree BUT I did make a decent quiche for dinner, so win-win :)

Also my man is brewing his own beer and it is weird and very exciting at the same time.


Good night for now, maybe a short story to go up this week,

Keep on, keepin' on,

M.

Oh Those Spirits Are Coming 'Round Again!

Hello, Christmas. Welcome back. You came a bit earlier than I had wanted....I saw too many evergreen branches before Halloween had left! But now here in December, now that I've played with ghosties and had my fill of turkey and pumpkin pie, now I find myself hugging trees and drinking eggnog and thinking about gifts! I work in retail so really I get a bit Scroogy during the first days of Christmas rearing its tinseled head. But then I think of the trees and the lights and the family time and the smells of the kitchen......and I, I just get all wrapped up in it. (Ha!)

Today I spent a lovely evening with lovely girls that because of schedules we don't get to hang out as much as we'd like to. We laughed and swapped stories and remembered to motivated ourselves towards our dream lives. I feel like we will grow old and have our families and still laugh and swap stories and it will still be lovely.

I like Christmas and I like that it brings people together. All the parties and gatherings and memories to smile and talk about in future Christmas parties. I suppose, even working in the craziness, you get older and you remember what's important. And you think about how happy it makes you, and well, you just end up loving it.

Keep on keepin' on,

M.